I’ve hung a sling in nearly every place I’ve lived over the past 20 years; where there is wood, there is a way. Even if you live in a concrete tower or a mobile home, don’t give up hope. There are many ways to safely hang a sling that won’t scare your kids, your mother, or the neighbours.

Disclaimer: These instructions are no substitute for common sense and experience. If you’re a total n00b with houses and tools, get help from someone who knows what they’re doing. Don’t come suing me if these instructions contain an error or you do something stupid.

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Step 1. Get the Right Hardware

First step is a trip to the hardware store for hardware to hang the sling. Either chain or rope will work, though rope stretches as it’s loaded, which can make finding the perfect height difficult. On the other hand, chain is heavy and can be noisy (but some folks think chain sounds [and looks] sexy).

For chain, look for one-inch forged links (plain steel, chrome plated, or even galvanized), along with four to eight 250 kg (min) rated carabiners or quicklinks to attach the chain.

For rope, braided nylon stretches the least. You need 1/2 inch rope rated at 500kg (min) for single lines, or 3/8th inch rated at 250 kg (min) for doubled lines.

To estimate total length, a good rule of thumb is your ceiling height minus three feet, times four. If you want a sling that hangs closer to the floor, increase that estimate. For comfort, make the chains/ropes at the head end approximately one foot shorter than the foot.

You’ll also need four steel lag eyes, eyebolts, or hooks, at least 3/8 inch in diameter and 3 inches in length. (We’ll call these “hooks” from here on.)


Step 2. Figure Out Where to Hang Your Sling

You need to hang your sling from the building frame at a point where it can bear the extra load. The simplest situation is a basement or attic with exposed ceiling joists or roof rafters. Knots, cracks, voids, bugs and rot can all weaken the wood; with exposed joists you can see what you are drilling into.

Floor joists (as in “there’s a floor above you”) are your best choice, as they are made to bear heavier loads. Roof rafters can usually handle an adequate load (400 to 600 lbs.), assuming the room is no bigger than 10 ft., including joists, from wall to wall.

If there is a false/dropped ceiling, attach the points to the original ceiling/floor joists, and lead the chain/rope down through temporarily removed false ceiling panels. Though it’s a pain to remove and replace the ceiling panels, it does solve the coverup problem.

In considering where to hang your sling, also think about play proximity to walls, windows, doors, heat and comforts.

The distance between the hooks varies depending on the ceiling height. Here are some estimates:

Between the head-end hooks:
Seven-foot ceiling: 24 inches
Ten-foot ceiling: 36 inches

Between the foot-end hooks:
Seven-foot ceiling: 4 foot 6 inches
Ten-foot ceiling: 7 feet

Head to foot:
Seven-foot ceiling: 5 feet 6 inches
Ten-foot ceiling: 8 feet

Locate the joists with a studfinder. You’ll need to find the exact centre of each joist at the place where you want to mount a hook. Follow the directions on the studfinder, and be very careful and methodical with this process.


If you have a flat plaster or drywall ceiling, mark the spot where you’ll drill, then cover it with masking tape — it will stop the surface of the ceiling from shredding during the next step.


Step 3. Drill and Mount the Hooks

You will need to drill at least two and a half inches into the wood itself, not counting the depth of drywall/plaster and lath.


Measure the length of the shaft (the straight part) of your hook (again, minimum 3/8 inch and 3 inches long), and mark your 3/16ths drill bit with visible tape at 1 inch less than that.


Drill your holes as vertically as possible to the mark. As you’re drilling, pay attention — how does the hole feel, sound, look and smell?


Good signs:
You felt resistance as you drilled through the wood.
The drill dust was dry and blondish.

BAD signs (find another spot!):
You heard a “squeeee” as the drill hit a nail.
The drill motor never loaded (slowed as the drill hit resistance),
or it unloaded suddenly as the drill popped out into nothingness.
The drill dust was dark, damp or smelling funky.


If all your holes are good, find a screwdriver or other tool with a good fit and the right leverage, and start screwing. Twist all four hooks in as far as you can, leaving only the bare working minimum exposed. All hooks should feel stiff and stable after installation.





Step 4. Test Your Hooks

To test each hook, attach a length of chain, and tape or tie a rag around the hook (to pad it in case it pops out and lands on your head).


Make a solid loop at the base of the chain for your foot, step in it and bounce on it. As you bounce, ask a helper to check whether the ceiling flexes.


Check each one like that, giving special attention to the foot-end hooks (that’s where most of the load will be).

If the ceiling flexes more than 3/4 of an inch under load, or if a hook feels loose or pulls out more than 1/8th inch after testing, DO NOT USE IT. Either remount the hook, or find another spot for your sling.

Step 5. Cover Up

When you are finished installing and testing, brush off the dust and give the hooks a touch of some matching paint (flat if possible, it’s less reflective).

Then ask a kinky friend if they can spot the mystery changes in your playspace. Unless someone’s really looking for the hooks, they should be almost invisible.

When you’re moving out, remove everything and squirt the right colour of toothpaste into the holes and smooth or shape as needed. Very few people even look at ceilings — fewer still see anything.